Thursday, April 19, 2012

If you can't afford dogfood...don't get a dog.

I should warn you. This is going to bother some people. And you should know it's not my intention to hurt feelings. But I have had enough. And when I have had my fill I like to express my side. And this is my blog, so I'm going to go ahead and do that. Now.

This is about government aide and more specifically wic. I have had so many run ins with this lately. And a friend of mine wrote a blog, I made a comment (that I knew people wouldn't want to hear) and then some people wrote their defense. Even though I wasn't talking about or to them. Funny thing. These blogs. If were not careful we can take offense where none was meant. I'm guessing that will happen here.

First of I should say I have never used wic. Not because we didn't qualify. Not because money is flowing about our ears. Because its not. But because I believe if you have children it is YOUR responsibility to provide for them. Not the government (aka the working class people) I'm a republican. I'm fairly liberal. That's another subject though. But on this I am a republican. True to the heart. And I would argue that if you receive these services than you should vote democrat. But we won't get into to that. At least not right now.

Now I believe these services need to be in place. People need them. People lose jobs, get hurt, lose money, things happen. That's life. And as a society we should look out and care for each other. We need to. We need these services. They do a world of good. They are such a blessing to those that need them. I am grateful I live in this country.

But that's not what I'm talking about. I'm bothered by the abuse of the system. I have zero respect for those that use the system because it is there. It is repulsive to me to see so many people on wic, with smart phones, brand new cars. Cable, brand new clothes, gap dressed children. This is where I get bothered. I can't stand the hypocrisy that goes on. How is that you cannot afford to feed your baby but you can afford an iPhone? And iPad? And new car? And cable? It's not right. I firmly believe that before people can get aide, we look into there spending. And make them cut back. And them if they really cannot provide for their own then get them some help! Do you know we have NEVER had cable? We don't have new cars. And yet, we provide for our family.

The thing that worries me is this feeling of entitlement. How sad is our generation. We feel so entitled to everything and yet we have such a lack of works ethic. So sad. So many people have taken out loans, and yet feel they shouldn't have to pay them back. Sometimes I wonder what planet these people came from. I know I'm not alone, my hubs, my family, my friends share these views with me.

The thing that bothers me is how lax we have become. Did you know once upon a time people didn't talk about being on wic. It was a source of shame. It was a quit a matter that families worked hard to get out of. While, I don't think people should be ashamed for needing help (who doesnt) what bothers me is how open people are. Oh you can get this for free. Or eq presidents announcing to their groups "hey the rules have changed, so you will need to cut back on your hours to get more money". This is appalling. I have seen it too often. I'm hoping that its just this small little town I currently reside in. If a mother CAN nurse her baby then I believe she should. If she quits because she doesn't like it (who does?) Then I think SHE should buy her own Dang formula. If she can't nurse, or needs to supplement then they should get the help they need. If its a matter of luxury, well I don't think tax payers should have to provide that.

Then there's the school. My husband is in school, so we should get help. Well that doesn't work for me. My husband was in school. And we made it work. Does that mean I expect everyone to? Heck no. But just because your hubs is in school doesn't mean your entitled to everything. If you can't make ends meet, then of course you should be getting help. But if you have cable, new cars, new phones, go shopping often. Well, then I would argue a different solution than government aide.

And the thing that REALLY bothers me is when people say "I will pay it back xxxx amount." Unless you keep track of how much you receive and then ACTUALLY pay that amount back, you won't. And what about those of us who struggle without taking the freebies? We just keep paying for it... That is the most frustrating thing to hear.

So there. I've vented. I believe these programs need to be in place, I believe in helping take care of each other. I understand these services. I have done my research. I can't stand when people say I don't understand because I don't use it. Wow. I'm an informed voter. I read. I research. Call me crazy. But don't accuse me of not understanding just because I don't use it. And I will call out the errors and abuse. Wic is meant to be a short term program to help people get back on their feet. It's not there to be abused. But who will call that out? Who really cares about being honest? Who cares about being honest in their dealings with others? Apparently not a whole lot of people.

I hope you can see where I am coming from. I hope you understand that I wasn't talking about YOU specifically. I hope you know that I understand these programs. I also hope you can see that this system is grossly abused. And that is not ok in my book.

10 comments:

Mindy said...

I agree with you Kendra! I remember working at the grocery store in college and helping women with their WIC or food stamp orders. They would hand me their WIC checks with their hand that adorned a BIG FAT diamond ring and french manicured nails and then I'd look up and see the freshly cut and highlighted hair and designer clothes. IT DROVE ME CRAZY! It seemed like such a joke to me. I get what you are saying 100%.

Ashley and Blake said...

I was just saying this same thing yesterday. And I do have a friend that I think uses it properly and another who totally abuses it. I don't think it's right for them to be on it and living in better conditions than we are!! Expensive apartment, brand new car, etc. And I hate it when they say, "this is free, and I got so much free formula," and I just think, it's not free, no one is donating it to you from these individual companies, we are paying
for it!

And btw, I think you wrote this out very well.

Nicole said...

This may surprise you- but I agree with about 98% of what you said. We have never had smart phones, new cars (in fact we only have 1 car.. and it is a 2002. Hard to have 1 car for sure, but we live), etc. My kids wear hand me downs, gifted clothes, and garage sale clothing. I work hard to not spend money on impractical things. We do currently have an ipad at our disposal, but only because my husband's little brother went on a mission and we are 'babysitting' it. This will also surprise you- we never milked the system. When I got pregnant with Samantha, we did not use Medicaid, we used insurance. We qualified for it and WIC, but did not use them, because we made it work. There was a very short time (less than a year) when things in our life took a different and unexpected turn and we used WIC and Medicaid for the kids. Being FAR below the poverty line (we have always been below, I'm talking lost job, no income), we qualified for every single government aid including food stamps and even government subsidized housing. But we made it work with WIC and medicaid for the kids, though it was for a very short time also, and both just while we needed them until things got better. Luckily we had enough food storage that we made it through, and I can say that my kids never went hungry, thanks to WIC. My wedding ring is fake, I don't get my hair professionally dyed, I use Suave shampoo, and I only pay $11 for my haircuts. And usually my parents and parents-in-law buy me clothes for my birthday and Christmas (that's where I get my sorta cute clothes from. If I had good style like you, they would be cuter!! ;)) Where I differ is that I have no shame in telling good, hard- working people that if they NEED WIC, they should use WIC. I don't know what their circumstances are, and if there is a NEED, that is what it is there for. I know what it is like to feel suffocated by the thought of going into debt just to buy food, when it, rent, and insurance are your only expenses. I would never tell someone to get on WIC if they are just lazy and not trying to go anywhere in life. I believe that WIC is there to help those who truly need it. I also know what it is like to use it at a grocery store and have judgmental glares, and to hear judgmental comments from others at Church or wherever. No one knew that we could barely afford rent and insurance, let alone food, and I wasn't about to tell them that. I believe that if someone truly NEEDS it (not to be confused with needing it, but because they planned for it) then they should use it, and for most people, we don't know what circumstances they are in, and it isn't for us to judge, even if we do know they are abusing it.

Kendra and Caleb said...

Nicole, I hope that you understand that I know there is a need for these programs and that was not was I was talking about. What I don't agree with is not judging. We have a right and more so a responsibility to recognize when things are being abused. If something is not right, I will not call it right. I believe in looking at actions and recognizing if they are right or wrong. If there is wrong I will not turn a blind eye. Stealing isn't ok, lying isn't ok and abusing the system isn't ok. And pretending like it is, is only going to mess our country up even more.

Mrs. Hornberger said...

I knew nothing about welfare until we were a few weeks away from moving out here. I was in contact with friends of mine who were already in medical school and I was asking them how they were able to afford to live and raise children on the limited budget the school gives every one to live. When they all told me they were on food stamps and medicaid I thought "Ghetto." I didn't think we would need government assistance and thought we could figure out how to do it on our own. Once we got out here and started budgeting the numbers it was obvious that we wouldn't be able to do it on our own. If i were to work, my paychecks would barely cover day care. (the economy isn't exactly booming over here in Erie...its actually pretty crappy!) There wouldn't be anything left over for insurance. I have so many friends out here in different situations. My friend Jody and her husband owned their own business and did very well for themselves for many years. As the economy started to get worse they decided her husband would further his education. They already had 3 kids before they decided to go to medical school. Now they are here and now they need it. Another friend of mine was in a similar situation. Her husband was a hard working nurse and made decent money. They had two kids. At the last minute they decided he would go back to school to be a nurse anesthetist. So now they're here and they need it. We dont use WIC but we use food stamps and medicaid. I didn't want to post on here because I actually am embarrassed of using government aid. Im surprised that you know so many people who are not ashamed of it. I think the system is totally flawed and definitely has room for improvement. I do not in ANY way feel in titled to the programs we use, but I feel very grateful that they are there. You say you dont think someones husband being in school is reason for using it....and thats the situation we are in. We never used government aide while jared did his under gad but now that we have 2 kids and have another 4 years ahead of us, I dont feel bad to use it. I do get embarrassed at the store when I use it or at the Dr.s office when they announce loudly that I am on medicaid. Jareds school required him to buy a new computer and they wouldn't cover the cost. So we bought a used one from his brother and it ended up being ghetto. He got his money back and we bought an iPad that we ended up paying only $100.00 for (ill tell you how we pulled that one off some other day :) I now buy clothes for my children at Once upon a child (used clothing store) and both of our parents often send nicer clothes for the kids. We dont have much left over per month. Every thing we do is for free or really cheap. We go to free story time at the library and bought year round SUPER CHEAP passes to the zoo and children's museum. I cook dinner every night and if my parents offer to send us money or buy us things Ive started to accept it. Jared did a scholarship through the army to avoid going into debt. They pay for all his school and give us money to live on every month. It adds up to about what every one else gets in student loans only our money is taxed and we dont get it in one lump some. Every one else with student loans can take out extra THOUSANDS of dollars per semester. We are not allowed to because of the scholarship so we have less money coming in then every one else I know.

Mrs. Hornberger said...

There are many people who abuse the system. Who lie. There are many people who raise their kids to live under the poverty level so that they can get these benefits. Those people make me sick. But Jared is going to school to be a dr. Most likely an E.R. dr. where he will treat people who won't ever pay their bills and who are on mediacaid (like us) and won't pay much for their services. Does that mean I think we damn well deserve free stuff? No. But I think we deserve them MORE then the ghetto people who refuse to get off their asses and even try to work. I understand your frustration. When I was working, it would piss me off so much to see social security money coming out of my check because by the time I need it I probably won't get it. And the tax money coming out of my pay check going to other people who are lazy and feel entitled. I get it. You said every thing very well. I just felt like I had to plead my own case because my husband is in school and we have an iPad. You also forgot to talk about some other things...like unemployment. I know a lot of people who use unemployment as a source of income. They get laid off and then dont even bother looking for a new job until their benefits run out because "My taxes paid into unemployment."
Do you know that the republicans are trying for major welfare reform? Romney wants to make it so if you are on welfare or collecting unemployment, you have to be enrolled in school or actively looking and applying for jobs or else your benefits will be taken away. I think that is awesome. I think this whole issue with welfare fraud would be less of an issue if some other things were improved. Like health care. Its soooooo incredibly expensive. We had "Good" health care before we moved out here and it still cost an arm and a leg to have a baby and get treated at the E.R. or dr.s office. I know you said take no offense where none is intended but I had to explain our situation because I know for a fact people judge us for both being on assistance and maybe for thinking we can afford to not be on it. I hope you dont think I was rude or disagreeing with you because I actually agreed with most every thing you said especially the part about stealing and lying to get benefits. I love u so much and I can't wait to see you. P.S. my post wasn't as good as yours because my thoughts are all over the place and I had a lot to say. Love u. P.S. smell this you're coming.

Mrs. Hornberger said...

p.s. i had to post twice because i had two many words.

Kendra and Caleb said...

Oh katiebug. Did you read my blog? I know your situation and I wasn't talking about you. I love you. Of course there are people who get ipads and stuff as gifts or on great deals, that's not what I'm talking about. I'm not asking for confessions...unless someone admits they are milking the system, now that would be interesting. And I am always wondering if I am paying the babysitter to work or working to pay the babysitter. It's hard stuff!!! Love you. And I like Romney, I think he would make a great president. Esp when he talks money, aide, and loans. It's so refreshing and so American!!!

Sara said...

Couldn't agree with you more. I want to say so much more, but I should keep my mouth shut.

Jessica said...

I think you're exactly right. There are definitely people out there who take advantage of the system and it ruins it for people who genuinely need help. I grew up in a family that didn't have much--both of my parents had to work but even with 2 incomes and keeping shopping strictly to necessities it was hard to make ends meet. My mom was on WIC for a few months when I was born, and when each of my sisters was born. Another BS thing is insurance, at least in my state. I live in AZ, and they recently passed a law where you only qualify for state insurance (AHCCCS) if you have a minor child. So any of the trashy 16 year olds who accidentally get pregnant because they're idiots get free healthcare, but people who need it are denied. I have a friend whose mother is struggling with Parkinsons, and despite this, she works, but her employer doesn't offer insurance. Her AHCCCS will be terminated at the end of June because her daughter turns 18, and then she'll have no way of paying for treatment. AZ is very backwards on a lot of things.