Remember, Remember

Porter will be ONE on Sunday. There are some things I want to REMEMBER:

*All of my pregnancy tests came out negative. I was so disappointed. I have to have blood work done to know. Remember that for the next time.
*Pregnancy is HARD-I threw up a LOT, I passed out at work, I threw up a LOT, I got SWINE FLU, I was in the hospital, I threw up a LOT and then had a beautiful baby boy
*The first time we heard your heartbeat was like music to my ears. We both cried.
*The first time I felt you move was during a Harry Potter movie at the dollar theater. I thought my heart would burst.
*You never liked for me to lye on my side. You would push until I moved
*I thought that if I tapped my belly to the beat of a song you would come out with rhythm. Porter's got some serious moves. Must have worked.
*I was terrified of giving birth. I should have been terrified of the recovery.
*The moment the nurse told me you weren't doing so well during the 2nd non-stress test my heart stopped
*Every time the nurses came in and checked on us and then left to call the doctor my heart stopped.
*When they told me they would have to use a vacuum to get you out (after over 2 HOURS of actively pushing) I was terrified. When they told me Porter would be out in ten minutes I was thrilled.
*The Dr. told me to look at you as you came out. I did. It was so strange.
*The second I knew you were ok my heart leaped. Then I felt like super-woman
*The first time I held you in my arms I knew I would do whatever it took to take care of you.
*Breastfeeding is HARD.
*The first time you fussed (at around 3 weeks) I called my mom and asked her what to do and to please come back.
*The first time you smiled I knew I would do whatever it took to see that for the rest of my life
*Recovery is hard. At least for me.
*The first time you roller over I cried. I was at work. And missed it.
*The first time you sat up I cried. I was there and so proud.
*The first time you crawled it was to get my hair. We screamed and laughed and maybe cried.
*The first time you clapped I was so proud.
*Leaving you to go to work with someone other than family is HARD. Every time.
*Every time you meet a developmental milestone my heart is full of gratitude (remember I work with kids that are way behind)
*The first time you got sick I felt like the weight of the world was on my shoulders. The fact that it was my fault made me feel sick to my stomach. I am STILL so sorry.
*The fact that you love bath time and water makes me so proud.
*The way you laugh and giggle is honestly the cutest thing in the world.
*We can hardly carry on a conversation that doesn't revolve around you and how cute you are. And we like that.
*I thank Heavenly Father everyday for you.
*You love to play with balls. Daddy is so proud.
*I never thought having a boy could be this fun. I hope I have another one next.
*You are so cuddly. I taught you how to kiss and hug and every single one of those is to die for.
*This has been a hard year.
*This has been a trying year.
*This has been a growing year.
*This has been the most miraculous year of my life.
*I can't believe you will be ONE. I can't believe that I get to be your Mommy. I love you Porter.

I've lost the manual...

The baby manual, the Porter manual. You know the one that descends from the Heavens the moment your baby is placed in your arms and tells you everything you need to do and how to do it. Wait. You didn't get one? Oh no! How sad. Well I did...but it seems to be lost, probably from the move. SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO I need some help. Porter will be ONE on April 3rd. I will be DONE nursing him. Not sure how to ween him. He takes a bottle like a champ, and has been since I went back to work when he was 6 weeks old. But how do I DO it? I have been reading and reading and I am just not sure. It says to drop a feeding a day and then a few days later drop another, so do I just give him my stored milk? What if I don't have enough? And I have been reading how you should go straight to a CUP? Porter can drink water out of a cup when we hold it, he can hold it but he spills more than he drinks. So how does THAT work? I have had enough problems with breastfeeding and I really don't want to experience PAIN so I NEED YOUR HELP. Calling all moms!!! How do I do this thing???? Hopefully Porter's manual will turn up but until then I'm counting on you!

Happy St. Patty's Day

I've been feeling really un-lucky lately. I had strep, Porter had pink eye, then Caleb had strep and guess what??? I have an ear infection. So we can use a little luck around here. Some things I am lucky to have: a hubs, who will give up going to the gym with his friend to sit by me and hold me while I cry (ear infections REALLY really hurt), his job, he loves it and is good at it, my job, our baby, Porter is the best thing I have ever made, I am so crazy about him, our home, our friends, our family, our ward, our health (when it's better), our future. It's going to be a good St. Patrick's day here. Hope it is for you too. I'm thinking mint shakes tonight...anyone interested???

P.S. As you know I am home sick with an ear infection. I haven't had energy to do anything but lay around. Luckily I can lay around with my computer so go ahead and check out my last 10 new posts :)

Rex Lee on a more personal note

A good friend of ours and a one-time babysitter of Porter's was recently diagnosed with Leukimia. He is 27 years old. His wife is pregnant. I can't even begin to imagine what it must be like. And I wont pretend to. Caleb and I felt terrible but you can only say "I'm so sorry" so many times. So we decided to DO something. We ran the Rex Lee Race in support of Ian. We invited our Ward to do it with us and Friday night we had a T-shirt making party and wore them to the race on Saturday. Caleb was sick so he walked the 5k with Porter and I ran the 10k. I finished in 53 mins 29 seconds. It was really fun. I love/hate doing Cancer races. My paternal grandmother died of Ovarian Cancer when i was 12. My maternal grandmother is a breast cancer survivor as is my aunt. I hate cancer. I cannot wait until we have a cancer free future. It really was a nice race. The shirts say "Team Bergeson" and on the back it says "We've got your back Ian". I am so excited for a day when cancer is not a part of our world.

11 months

Hey world,
It's me, Porter. One more month till I'm the big One. I am growing like a weed. My hair is growing even more than that. My 'rents and I decided not to cut it until I'm three. It's the Jewish tradition Upfsherin. We're not Jewish but Mom is way into it right now. So don't ask when I'm cutting it. It is really curly and with my beautiful eyes people sometimes tell the 'rents how beautiful their girl is. I'm man enough to not let it get to me. I still love bath time. I learned how to kick and man is that awesome. I can't wait till summer when I can go to the water park all the time and Oceanside. I am standing on my own a little more and can walk while holding on to things. I can clap! I clap all the time now. I still love to dance and play peek-a-boo. I love to eat big boy food and to drink water from a cup. I am so crazy about my Daddy. I just love him so much. Mom blames herself for having to leave me at such an early age but I love her too. I love to give kisses. I really like other babies but sometimes I like to touch their faces and mom tells me "no". I think "no" is a funny word. I love to be chased and to knock down towers. I am still a happy guy. I've had a rough time with sleep the past few nights. I'm trying to work on that. I guess turning one is a big deal. I'm pretty excited for my party. I'll keep you posted!

Love,
Porter

Matchy Matchy

I wanted Porter's little onesize from BabyGap the moment I saw it. Because it was from BabyGap I wouldn't buy it at full price (EVERYTHING goes on sale there) so I waited. And waited. And then it happened. It went on super sale. And I NEEDED it. But they didn't have Porter's size (well the size I wanted, Porter was still very much inside my belly) so I checked the baby manaquin and it was the size I wanted. So I took the baby manquin and told them I wanted to buy it. The onesize, not the doll. And then while shopping with my sister Katie, I saw the shirt I'm wearing at Forever 21 and new it would match. So she bought it for my birthday. For me to hoard until I popped that kid out, lost some weight and could wear it. Together. Who said mommy's and their boy's can't match???

Chinese New Year!

I cannot wait until we get to celebrate Chinese New Year in Asia. Hopefully that wont be too far in the future. Until then we will keep on celebrating it here in Provo, UT. I was lame and didn't plan a whole shin-dig this time but we still went to China Lilly with our friends, Katie and Joey (why didn't I take a group picture?). Silvia was there (when isn't she?) and she loved seeing Porter. She guessed that I was having a boy before I new, we told Scott and Corinne the news there, had Caleb's graduation lunch there and have some of the best memories there. Of course she gave us our favorite appitizer for free and our favorite dessert. Man I miss Taiwan.

Snowshoeing, it's a verb

I realize that my lack of blogging may make it seem like we do nothing. I promise we are busy. And then we have fun. This was one of those times. We deceided to embrace the snow and get out and do some shoeing, some snowshoeing. It took us awhile to finally start our snowshoeing adventure so we didn't get to stay out as long as we liked but it was fun. And beautiful. Porter was warm in his snow outfit (from BabyGap and more than 60% off) he loved being in the backpack but did NOT want to keep his head in the cover. So the entire time we hiked he leaned out the right side so he could see. His little nose was red and cold! Caleb's friend Joey came with us even though my friend Katie was sick at home. We missed you!

Bink-aholic

Pman is addicted. He LOVES his binky. And sometimes I love to watch him suck on it. And other times I love to see what creative way he will chew on it. One day, not soon but not too far way, there will be an intervention. Until then suck away.

Lo Lo Lo VE

This Lover's Day was a bit more relaxed than some we've had in the past. My sister Katie and her two kiddos came down and we went to lunch and did a little shopping, then when Porter and I came home I found a surprise in the kitchen. Caleb got me flowers and decorated (and a story of course). We went to Happy Summo and got take out and came home and ate up and watched a movie. Porter loved his Valentine's toys from his grandma's and he loved his card that Mama mailed to him. I love lover's day. I love you hubs!

10 Month (in February)

Hey There,
So life has been busy. I meant to post this in February but I had so much going on, so please forgive me. I am 10 months old! Everyone loves my curly hair and I pretty much love it too. I really love bath time and play time and nap time. My 'rents found me an amazing babysitter. Her name is Rebekha and I love her. I really like to go on walks and check everything out. I say "yeah" all the time. Ask me a question and I will most likely answer "yeah". When my mom picks up a call I say "yeah" really loud. I am a crawling machine. Stairs don't scare me. My Mom also taught me how to dance. She says it's one of her favorite things. I love watching her dance, it just cracks me up but dancing with her is even better. My Dad taught me how to blow and now I can blow bubbles if you give me a straw. I am so close to standing on my own. Everyone keeps saying "it'll happen any day now" or "he'll be walking by tomorrow" but I just go at my own pace. I love to play peek-a-boo. That's another trick mom taught me. I put my head down and then lift it up. Sometimes people don't realize that I'm playing with them so I play even faster and then my 'rents tell them how to play. I love to eat and love puffs. I love to throw the ball, dad taught me this one. Pretty much I love to play anything with balls, I even crawl around with them in my hands. Here is my score: weight: 17-18 lbs, height: tall,teeth:just the bottom two still, brains: super smart, tricks: pretty much advanced, cuteness: almost too much to handle. Life is good.

Love,
Porter

Lent it Begin

Happy Ash Wednesday. And happy first day of Lent. Lent is not an LDS (Latter Day Saint/Mormon) Holiday but I have participated in it since High School. This year for Lent I am giving up eating out and recreational shopping! I enjoy both a little too much so this year will truly be a challange. So: 40 days and 40 nights NO shopping and No eating out. Wish me luck! What are YOU doing for Lent?

Not Un-grateful

If you are wondering why I have posted 4 blogs on a morning that I should be at work...it's because I have strep throat. And not allowed back at work until I have been on anitibiotics for 24 hrs. And that time isn't close yet. I felt bad about my Alexander post. It was a bad day. But I don't want to come off as if I have nothing good in my life. Yes, some things are bad right now. But, I have an amazing hubs who loves me and takes really good care of me. I have a sweet baby that knows when Mommy doesn't feel well, like yesterday when he would stop playing and crawl over to me and give me hugs. I have a sister that would drop everything and come with her 2 babies to help me. I have a mom that I can call and cry to whenever I need. I have friends that are so willing to help, even with everything they have going on in their lives. My family is healthy. I may have some health issues, and it will take some time before we figure them out but I have it better then most "sick" people. I have a beautiful home that we rent, food on the table (lately cooked by the hubs or purchased by the hubs). I have it good. And I am HAPPY. So I hope I don't come off as Debbie Downer. Yes, bad days happen. And I will blog about them. But I realized it's been awhile since I have said how happy and grateful I am for the GOOD things in life.

Highlights of 2010

2010 was full of some serious changes. Our biggest obviously was the birth of Porter. Caleb was released from the Singles Ward ( The calling is only a year long and our year was up) Caleb graduated from BYU, we celebrated our third year anniversary, we took our baby to Oceanside, I had some painful recovery issues, we found strength in our marriage that hadn't been tried before and found that having a baby was better than we could have ever imagined. Even with all the health issues I had, 2010 was a great year. We went through a lot, things that don't need to be mentioned and some things that I don't want to remember. 2010, sorry I wished you away, it really was a good year. Bring it on 2011.

Christmas 2010 (in March)

I believe it is never too late to catch up. So here is our Christmas in California. It was amazing. We were able to see our friends Becka and Brian (move here) and their sweet little guy, and Porter's BFF. We saw my grandparents and Caleb's grandpa and brother and nephew. I was able to go for a lot of runs and spend some quality time with my family. Porter is a rock star on planes. He rarely cries and handles it like a champ. He loved seeing family. Christmas with a baby in one word: AMAZING! And he didn't even know what was going on. I can hardly wait for the rest of this boy's life. One picture shows my sister Kelly and I at church. We did not plan that outfit! We both got the sweater for Christmas and we had the skirt from years ago. Great minds think identical if you ask me. Christmas was really great and Porter was spoiled rotter. Also great in my book. I had a wonderful birthday keeping with the tradition of eating at Simple Simon's for lunch. I love being home for the holidays!